December 6, 2022

The Haiku Handicapper handicaps the Queen’s Plate

by JOE NEVILLS

Freelance journalist Joe Nevills analyzes the field for the 2018 Queen’s Plate on Saturday at Woodbine using Haiku, a form of Japanese the uses a 17-syllable structure with 3 lines of 5, 7, and 5 syllables each.

#1 – Boyhood Dream

Up the class ladder
After going down a chute
The top Ramsey shot

#2 – Cooler Mike
Fourth-itis last year
But he’s come along at three
Tough to win up front

#3 – Inge
The fraction-setter
Has been an outstanding claim
Distance a hard ask

#4 – Strike Me Down
Not much to dislike
Breeding, record, connections
Decent-priced win threat

#5 – Silent Poet
Adding three furlongs
From his prior longest race
Could land anywhere

#6 – Real Dude
Has the right bloodline
But he lacks experience
Best of the maidens

#7 – Dixie Moon
Hard-fought Oaks winner
Is on her preferred surface
And has beaten boys

#8 – Alternate Route
You’d think it would click
The Turfway/Woodbine angle
Doubt it helps this one

#9 – Say the Word
Can’t count out Sam-Son
Though standout traits are lacking
For win or longshot

#10 – Telekinesis
Plate Trial winner
Doesn’t have much quit in him
It’ll go through him

#11 – Wonder Gadot
Battle-tough filly
Always shows up at the end
Seldom in first place

#12 – Pawnbroker
Use a skeptic’s eye
Like Rick Harrison’s haggling
Looks like a Chumlee

#13 – Marriage Counselor
Just graduated
In his fourth attempt against
Maiden claiming foes

#14 – Neepawa
Geroux’s a big get
But on the Casse food chain,
He’s a solid third

#15 – Aheadbyacentury
Snags a good rider
Everything else about him
Cries out “second tier”

#16 – Rose’s Vision
Shock Trial second
Gives Javi the assignment
A hard one to toss

Prediction
Telekinesis
Weathers a stretch slugfest with
Dixie Moon, Gadot

follow Nevills on Twitter @Joe_Nevills and all the Queen’s Plate action with hashtag #QP18