The Haiku Handicapper handicaps the Queen's Plate

by JOE NEVILLS

Freelance journalist Joe Nevills analyzes the field for the 2018 Queen’s Plate on Saturday at Woodbine using Haiku, a form of Japanese the uses a 17-syllable structure with 3 lines of 5, 7, and 5 syllables each.

#1 – Boyhood Dream

Up the class ladder

After going down a chute

The top Ramsey shot

#2 – Cooler Mike

Fourth-itis last year

But he’s come along at three

Tough to win up front

#3 – Inge

The fraction-setter

Has been an outstanding claim

Distance a hard ask

#4 – Strike Me Down

Not much to dislike

Breeding, record, connections

Decent-priced win threat

#5 – Silent Poet

Adding three furlongs

From his prior longest race

Could land anywhere

#6 – Real Dude

Has the right bloodline

But he lacks experience

Best of the maidens

#7 – Dixie Moon

Hard-fought Oaks winner

Is on her preferred surface

And has beaten boys

#8 – Alternate Route

You’d think it would click

The Turfway/Woodbine angle

Doubt it helps this one

#9 – Say the Word

Can’t count out Sam-Son

Though standout traits are lacking

For win or longshot

#10 – Telekinesis

Plate Trial winner

Doesn’t have much quit in him

It’ll go through him

#11 – Wonder Gadot

Battle-tough filly

Always shows up at the end

Seldom in first place

#12 – Pawnbroker

Use a skeptic’s eye

Like Rick Harrison’s haggling

Looks like a Chumlee

#13 – Marriage Counselor

Just graduated

In his fourth attempt against

Maiden claiming foes

#14 – Neepawa

Geroux’s a big get

But on the Casse food chain,

He’s a solid third

#15 – Aheadbyacentury

Snags a good rider

Everything else about him

Cries out “second tier”

#16 – Rose’s Vision

Shock Trial second

Gives Javi the assignment

A hard one to toss

Prediction

Telekinesis

Weathers a stretch slugfest with

Dixie Moon, Gadot

follow Nevills on Twitter @Joe_Nevills and all the Queen's Plate action with hashtag #QP18